LOOKING WAY AHEAD, where will you be in five-hundred years? Will time In heaven even be measured in years,? When will you die? None of us knows for sure. Sudden death happens, but for those of us who long to see the face of Jesus, the actual length of life doesn’t matter.
All marathons have a distant ending point, but my Finish Line happens to be within sight. My remaining days are now prep time for moving into a more upscale neighborhood. I already have my key, having been saved by God’s amazing grace. Yes, I’ll leave dear friends behind, but I’ll see Jesus face to face. I do have a lengthy, Meet & Greet list of old-friends, plus those zillion new acquaintances that may take all of eternity to meet. My heart is already in that wonderful place, even as my body is starting to grumble. I’m sad to push dear friends into mourning mode, but I ask you to picture me, living and thriving in the Real World, with Shadowlands left far behind.
All right—the specifics. Stage 4 lung cancer involves a lung mass, plus a bunch of affected lymph nodes. Not fixable. If I do nothing, it may be a matter of months. Modest treatment might give me a little extra time, and I need to decide about that, like, today. I am totally at peace with whichever. That new, Real World has a strong pull.
A friend sent me a copy of John Piper’s Don’t Waste Your Cancer. I’m already on his page and have discovered that the words, “I have Stage-4 Lung Cancer,” gets immediate attention. When I assure folks that I’m at peace with this, they relax and are more at ease with me.
Where will I be in 500 years? With the King of kings, the Lion and the Lamb, the Great I AM. Come see me. Ask for Ellie or whatever my new name might be.
I’m into hugging.
You may not be facing death right now, but are you thinking ahead? What decisions will you make when the time comes? Comment below, or email egus@me.com
Ellie, You write so well and are an inspiration to many, including me, to the glory of God. Recently, I made the decision to get a DNR bracelet because my body acts strangely to many different medications and treatments and, if it came to that, I would just as soon go home to be with Jesus. Love in Christ, Doug
Ellie, you continue to be in my thoughts and on my heart. A quote by CS Lewis about our True Home 🏡, has brought your “Shift in Residence” phrase to another level for me….it is from his book entitled ” The Problem of Pain: ” The Christian doctrine of suffering explains a very curious fact about the world we live in. The settled happiness and security which we all desire, God withholds from us by the very nature of the world; but joy, pleasure and merriment He has scattered broadcast. We are never safe, but we have plenty of fun and some ecstasy. It is not hard to see why. The security we crave would teach us to rest our hearts in this world and oppose an obstacle to our return to God: a few moments of happy love, a landscape, a symphony, a merry meeting with our friends, a bath or a football match, have no such tendency. Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.”
You are in my thoughts and prayers each day. I know you will bless all you encounter in however much time you have with us.
I love this! I get so tired of Christians moaning and groaning because they are finally able to go to heaven. For crying out loud! Did they never really mean all those heaven songs they’ve sung a hundred times? It boggles my mind. I am so anxious to go Home!
Love you Ellie, and appreciate your honesty and courage as you share your journey with us. I am so grateful that I have had great “role models” who stood firmly (and assuredly) upon their faith as they faced physical death. Yet another gift you are selflessly sharing with us from your loving and generous heart.
God bless you and Jim and your beautiful family as you travel this road with Jesus.
Sending boatloads of prayers from PEI!!!
Clark and Sue💗
I embraced the thought and welcoming my own death on September 3, 2013, the evening my Mom died, as she and I were alone in our family home, and we were engaged with the Angel Shadow of Death, knocking on Mom’s door.
I kissed her good by and begged the Lord to take me. She was my Mother, Sister and best friend here on earth. The Lord gifted me a good woman as mine Mom. Love at 1st sight Mom said. (I know it was before that). 😊
I felt this way for a very long time. I thought I had nothing left inside to give anyone. Having my Mom for 7 months alone after Dad just passed was our time. Caring for her during her dementia state of mind allowed me to see her child within at night.
I never knew the Lord’s plan that it would be I to take care of her this way. Then again, it was meant to be. We started alone together, grew up together. She gave birth to me at 15 yrs. old.
After I attended Grief Share at church, I was able to learn that life I’d what she would want for me and it just wasn’t my time yet. The Lord isn’t done making and shaping me. I have been dancing with death as a strange spiritual gift. Giving the love that swells up in my heart and runs red for the wonderful people the Lord has brought my way.
within thr passed 3 months, I was thinking of my own arrangements, not wanting to burdeon mh sn in financial hardship, I bought a 10,000 life insurance policy. If I am to die, I ask the good Lord to give me the 2 year wait period so I am fully vested. lol
I hope the Lord still sees me useful for his purpose and within the interim, I would get to have some time with a grandchild before I kiss the world good bye, and be in the presence of my Lord and Savior of whom I love and give my life to. I think I’ll see and greet Mom at the entrance. What a joy it will be.
Ellie, you’ve been on my mind a lot, but not in a sad way. I’m almost jealous of you (except for the physical “grumblings” as you put it). I’m ready to go be with Jesus, having believed and chosen Him long ago, like you. He has proven Himself to me. I don’t fear death. But I do wish I could put a lot of other “Shadow Life” things behind me: I wouldn’t need to buy any more underwear. All future engagements of the boring do-I-have-to-go? type would be cancelled. I’d no longer be searching for yet another tantalizing way to prepare chicken, or looking forward to replacing the roof. I’d be looking down on it!
Seriously – what a blessed hope we have, we who are in Christ. I will see you here, there, or “in the air”.
Love,
Marcia
I have only recently connected with you and learned of your story, but you have touched my heart from your first hello. Your writing is inspirational and uplifting, and I am sure you have already been assigned a writing gig “In the Sweet By and By”, whenever that time might be. You are in my prayers sweet lady.
Thanks, Ellie. Good, helpful, and sober thoughts, relevant for everyone, and especially us senior citizens!
You know, Ellie, I’ve known you for many years and we’ve laughed and cried our way down to the home stretch. This should mean I’m down here weeping and beating my pillow over your soon departure. (I’ll weep later.) But I’m not because I know how jumping-up-and-down happy you are to be going to be with Jesus. How can I be sad when you’re so happy? I wish all Christians could get a hold on the Joy beyond all joys that death leads them to. When you open the door and step into the King’s presence, see if you can get Him to let me in early.
I just want to tell you I love you! You are one of the people who made me feel welcome and comfortable in this “family”, where in the past I was saddened ( yet somehow relieved) to be a nameless face.
You are very dear to me Ellie. You are a one person welcoming committee in church with smiles, hugs, and encouraging words for everyone that you walk by on Sunday mornings. You cheeriness makes people feel so comfortable and welcome.
Wow, Ellie-you’ve articulated once again so powerfully and what a blessing to be knowing where you’re going! You’ll continue to be a tremendous blessing each day of your life, this or that side of Paradise. You are walking out Romans 15:13
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.“
Ellie, You are able to communicate so well your faith in Christ and how it relates to your present situation. Thank you, dear friend for sharing the deepest parts of your soul with so many. Your very spirit breathes inspiration to me and I thank God for you. May you be blessed beyond measure for your ” Kingdom living “, even as doctors words are grim…..you continue to be on my heart and in my prayers daily. Love, Dotty
I am praying for you and Jim and the entire family.
Janet
Much love for you, Ellie, and many thanks for the years of inspiration! I hope we have many more meetings on this side of Jordan, and rejoice to know that we will have countless hours together on the other side!
We continue to pray for you (and Jim). When I was going into surgery for my brain tumor 28 years ago, four months before Caleb was born, I heard the Lord say to me, “Dan, everything is going to be OK. If you don’t survive, you will be with me, and I will take care of Kathy & the baby.” That knowledge gave me peace about what I was about to go through.
I am now believing that departure is near, real and true. Your courage laying it bare astounds me.
I fully believe in Jesus’s assurance that, “And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am ( John 14:3).
All of us are like people who have boarded a bus going on a safari. Not all people will alight at the same destination and at the same time but differently. In the end, all will have a lighted.
Heaven is real. Apostle Paul testified when he was nearing the end of his life. That, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that day–not only to me, but also to all who have longed for His appearing (IITim 4:7-8).
May you find peace and joy in Him who loved us so much Ellie.
Such a delicate subject that I’ve given much thought to of late, featured in my last poem “A Reflection” (Face book posting awhile back). I’m well aware that my time is running out. Having extensive CAD (coronary artery disease) and AFib (Atrial Fibrillation) my days on earth could end any day now suddenly. Every day going forward is a bonus I don’t deserve, given that He’s given me 71 years already. That said I pray that Ellie’s days remaining with us are many, in part out of pure selfishness I admit as I am not prepared damn it to let such an extraordinary person go skipping out into the world beyond without my permission. Those prayers will continue with no fear that God will get sick of them. One day at a time and cling tenaciously to the serenity prayer, that’s what I say- nothing elegant, just practical stuff. In the end it’s what it all boils down to. Let’s spend what time we have in wholesome fellowship looking forward to life on the other side. Know that you are loved and in the end our time together will be infinite in intensity, meaningfulness and timelessness. Onward and upward in Christ, the perfect embodiment of love, what despite our most passionate endeavors we were not able to perfectly achieve in this short life on earth. God knows we tried and he loves us in spite of our falling short of His glory. No greater god could we possibly have worshipped than one who gave His only Son to pay the price for our failings. Much love to Ellie in this blurb as always. The sentimentality here might seem a bit over the top but I’m in a deep emotional turmoil as of this writing. Please forgive me for that.
Blessings,
Richard
Ellie, I was hoping to meet you here on earth, but it sounds as if that’s unlikely. I’ll be one of those on your heavenly list, and hope I can face “the end” as you are doing, as a new beginning. Bless you.
Ellie,
Your words are sad news but filled with a type of brightness. Brightness for the future ahead! Larry and I will pray for you and Jim. I love this verse: Psalm 116:7 ” Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to me.”. HE is the “ONCE MORE” God. We can go to Him over and over again and He never tires of giving us His rest! We love you and Jim! Stay strong in Jesus!!💞
One of my favorite lines from Psalm 34 is “Those who look to Him are radiant” (v.5) –His radiance is always showing through in your lovely smile and joy-filled countenance, even on this current journey! We pray you have continued peace & joy as you walk closer & closer to that day when you shall see HIM face to face. My greatest hope is that my extended family would know the peace & joy and yes, even anticipation that you have. Paul always says to me, “Just remember when I’m gone that I won’t miss this place!” Thank you Jesus that this world is NOT our home!! Love & Prayers for you & yours -especially Jim, who will miss you dearly. Until that day, I know you will make the most of every opportunity you have to share the GOOD news. ~Mary-Ellen & Paul
What an inspiring and encouraging piece to read. Just what these aching bones and weary soul needed today.
Such bravery of heart and soul. I’m at awe at the strength of your spirit as you look the last foe squarely in the face with a soul overflowing with beautiful faith and grace. From Glory to Glory like much afraid on the mountains your leaping with the two companions the shepherd gave her , however you seemed to have removed their veils. I’m thinking you left the valley of fear a long time ago. Your bag must be overflowing with rocks just like much afraid at each new time of surrender to her shepherd. We know all the stones turn into something beautiful as much afraid goes to the high places. Thank you Ellie for teaching me such wonderful things.
You are always in my heart Ellie. God gave me such a gift in you – gave all of us a gift. How special you are!!! The gifts he has given through you are truly inspiring and have changed me forever. I am so grateful to be part of your life and your journey. God walks with all of us because He loves us. How amazing to walk home with such joy, Love you dearly.
Ellie, I’m thinking of you and praying. I’m so glad to know we will meet one day in Heaven. But for now I am glad to know you here. May God bless you with continued peace and no pain. Love, Angela Breidenbach
Oh Ellie, thank you for your faith filled response. You inspire me.
Ellie my friend, you leave me in Awe!!! You are such an amazing lady and so strong and so brave. <3 I'm glad you are at peace with this, because what is there to fear right? I hope I am as strong as you when it is my turn one day, with God's help I will be because You my friend give me courage, for now I will say " I can only imagine!" Praying for you my friend and sending you lots of Hugs and Kisses XOXOXO I love you my friend. God Bless you.
Dear Eleanor, spiritual hugs are going out to you. Thank you for the unique beauty you are, which God created and graced us to experience.